April 2009
3 posts
morning oh morning
The mornings here are especially lonely. When I awake from my dreams to find the house empty and the floors cold on my feet, all I want to do is stay in bed. Today’s wind is pushing against the trees, and I can see the shadows of their branches dancing on my walls. Oh to move, “come on,” I say to myself slowly pushing the covers away and sitting up. “Come on,” I repeat sliding one leg off the side...
fact
I have a resilient spirit, fact.
I am not weak, fact.
then why do I let people push me around,
walk all over me,
treat me like trash.
why.
“you know when your kinda forgotten.”
March 2009
9 posts
“I’m only pretty sometimes.”
– anonymous
quelle heure est cela.
I am constantly evaluating myself and don’t like what I see. I can only do one thing at a time in order to do it well. This poses a number of problems, I’ve got a million things to do. I have a hard time asking for help, I don’t even know where to start. I am wasteful I am horrible at managing my time My art is mediocre My soul is dry I am hard to please I am narrow minded I am tired
February 2009
1 post
January 2009
6 posts
To Make A Turn
You’ve caught the devils cold, And his train leaves in the morning. His hands are like pure gold, Got yah climbing out your window. If reason can’t keep you here, And you’ve got to keep movin’. The city will miss you dear. But it holds nothin’ for yah, You say it holds nothin’ for yah. Love has turned you cold, And the silence even louder. Thinkin’...
road work ahead
Life is full of decisions, One always has options, and I find this absolutely exhausting at times, especially when I know what I must do. And in those moments, when my amiss nature, a constant companion not easily shaken, leaps from my side to the back of my neck, and rides me like an animal. Digging it’s claws into my flesh down to the bone. It’s the red stains on my shirt that remind me that...
while you rome
December 2008
18 posts
tip toe, tip toe.
(thoughts during my walk) I know the snow didn’t follow me here, but the thought comforted me. And so I walked with the certainty that I was not alone—-each of the delicate frozen flakes gently resting in their place, and I in mine. This feeling is so familiar to me yet so out of place. There are no trees here, except those planted by the residence of these homes—- each identical to...
poignant
I can’t write about love, No, it’s not the lack there of that has me dried… It’s every single little thing that’s become romanticized, exploited, disfigured. Is nothing sacred? There are times that I find myself standing still, And my thoughts become like a windmill, Turning and turning in that perpetual motion around my head. And when the wind is still, when humanity holds it’s breath, I can hear...
Dear internet, I would like to inform you that because of your generosity and availability I am obliged to take complete advantage of you. Not only are you a loyal companion but also you have risen above and beyond every expectation in all your amity. Because this is a give take relationship, I am extremely thankful that you are non-exclusive, and hold you in the highest regard. You are the reason...
No one could replace him...
he has my heart.
Okay so, my friend Christina got nominated for...
and this.
We could build a sanctuary
Collect our hats and yarn, make a house out of cards. We can try it and see if we like it. Why not a sky of yellow, and grass, orange. We’ll plant trees meant for climbing. Yes, yes, I can see it, we’ll dance around, bare feet.
I’m so tired of being scared.
November 2008
18 posts
oh--a desprate rant
What we have made a beautiful world to be. A masquerade, a plastic tree, a sitting pool, an ambitious fleet, a silver trey, a lit up screen. Amuse us, don’t use us. We’re an individual, that’s why we pay a pretty penny for our torn up shirts and jeans with holes. We’ll look authentic, but never pay our dues. Lets make things complicated for ourselves, and fill our shelves with the latest version...
Heres a new tune for yeah.
late night, it was bound to happen.
Sir Winter, I welcome Thee.
I enjoy the cold of winter, it evokes thought. It evokes feeling. In the cold, my fingers curl, like spools of yarn, clasped tightly, they find their place away from the wind.
a-non-sequitur
I’ve got to keep writing, even on days such as these, when my words would much rather sit beneath my tongue and rot. Don’t bother with me today; I’ve got a lot resting on the containment of my thoughts. There is nothing like having something to say so desperately and finding that the silence is louder than it has ever been. If I screamed, my voice would be drowned by my lips, and never touch the...
A Post-lude
I saw myself today, Age 62, and my hair grey. I was sitting at a stop light with a cigarette in my left and the fingers of my right grasping firmly around the top of the steering wheel. The skin on my face, a subject of time and gravity, was pail, no rose in the cheeks. My lips were tightly closed as though they were holding something in place, my teeth perhaps. Around them ran lines both...
when people come together,
each with his own love,
beautiful things happen,
so long as they are true.
treslittlebirds:
who am i to worry about a single thing.
THE BOOK even talks about it. i need not worry. my life is in HIS hands and i’m daily telling him i want to be subject only to HIS plans as well.
when it comes to love…pish posh. i don’t want to waste my time pining over someone when i could be dwelling on how in love i am with the lord and on how good my life really is. because really,...
Forgotten in the corner again.Treat every one well but don’t expect it in return.I think I’m going to take up reading again, so I can dwell on the problems of fictional characters instead of my own.Haha, now that I think about it, this, is a wonderful idea!!!dusty half finished book on the self…here I come.teach. me. something.
A Meditation For The Pallid
Can you hear it? Listen narrowly, this is wind. Sit still…your constant movement is depressing the silence. Shapeless, formless, oh to be as the air. To move with such harmony, in and out of avenues, Through the branches of great oak trees. To touch the mountain summits, and skim the seas. To compress a city to the ground with one simple gust To direct flight and get people where they must. How I...
My staggered steps towards an addiction free life:
I had not smoked for three days, After throwing out a pack of cigarettes early Sunday morning I was on my way. I owed it to a dear friend, I owed it to myself. One dropped habit, five thousand to go…or so I thought. Little did I know life had some cure balls to throw at me. You know the feeling I’m sure, where your walls appear to be falling in… And that, a result of multiple circumstances...